SO... ya.. I don't talk about my eyes often... It doesn't come up :)
I was born with bilateral Congenital Cataracts - translation? Old people eyes at birth in both eyes >.< lol not EXACTLY true lol... I have a film growing on my lens in both of my eyes. It WAS getting brown in color, but now it's clear... but it's still there and has spread.
I'm one of the rare ones whose brain interprets the cataracts as "dots" all over the place. The best way I can describe it is comparing it to the old TV's. Remember when the TV channel came in staticy? All the white dots? That's how I see. I can tune it out and it's not as harsh as the TV... it's somewhat see-through-able for me. Some people don't see the cataracts ... the brain ignores that they are there. I'm weird I guess :) But then, if you know me... you already know that HAHAH!!!
So, when you see a glare ball... I see part of a glare ball... the other part is blacked out in the shape of my cataracts. They're a snowflake pattern right across the center of my lens. Pretty hard to ignore. If I go out in bright sun... I can't see well. It's SO much light. It gets bounced around in my eyes and it HURTS!!!! LUCKILY, polarized sunglasses helps me to see well enough. Since I only have a very slight Astigmatism in one eye... so my eyes are perfectly able to see otherwise - thanks be... SO, ya, I can still drive. But I don't put myself in a position where I'm driving to places I don't know w/o GOOD landmarks. I like to be ultra careful. I can't read street signs on the older, smaller signs... The new ones are great!
I don't drive far at night... I'll stay within a mile - just far enough to get groceries, if I've need and forgot something and have to go back out to get it cuz i'm baking or whatever... or go to the theater - I volunteer at the local community theater (acting/stage - not movie).
I'm trying to train my dog to be a guide dog. She's almost 3 years old. She's a redbone coonhound/boxer mix. She's still learning and I'm hard on her to be there for me. Don't worry... she gets rewarded with treats and hugs and scratches. She's a sweetie!!! BUT when the light was out at the theater parking and I left late at night.... I couldn't see ANYTHING. I wasn't expecting it and I HATE when I'm caught off guard like that. Just total blindness... I froze and thought, "CRAP! I need my dog!!!!" I will have to start bringing her around the theater to get her used to it... When the kids are there, though, I think she'll still want to play, play, play.... She'll need to learn that the theater is a "work" place and not a "play" place.
I will have to buy her that harness for the blind and a "working - please don't pet me" vest... Poor Mitzie... She'll get even more treats, though. We're going to need to walk more, so she doesn't get fat (ter....) >.>
Right, so.... That's my eyes in a nut shell. Ew.. sounds gory hehe...
What's kinda neat is when I take a look at a glare ball up close... I can see individual cataract dots... they overlap... it's weird. You know what I should do? I should paint what they look like!!! :)
But ya... my eyes get tired fast and sometimes people chat in IMs to me SO FAST and I can't keep up because it's hard for me to read. I need larger text on the screen. Some people are down right inconsiderate about it. I'll ask them to slow down a little or to video chat with me instead and they refuse.
Now, I'm not holding everyone in the "rude" column lol.... Just the people who I KNOW know about my eyes ... But if I'm asking for video chat... NORMALLY it's because my eyes are KILLING me - tired eyes/unable to focus well on the text and they are aching.
I HATE having to do research on the internet these days. Mostly because it involves long hours squinting at the computer screen... and I have the wrinkle line between my brows to prove it >.< I hate that crease!!
"Why not use the polarized lenses to read the monitor?" You ask? Ya... tried that... polarized lens + screen = Rainbow trippyness lol... NOT productive to viewing anything ... other than rainbows... it's like seeing a puddle with oil on top ...
Anyway... just felt like sharing :)
Hope you're all doing well :)
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
I'm a horrible blogger lol >.< I don't even get into my blog easily, so it's something I add to the list of reasons why I don't blog often lol...
I actually wonder if I appear ADDish lol... somedays it's crafts crafts crafts... other days it's cello cello cello... other days it's YAY the violin bridge isn't snapping down! LOL!!!!
I had a horrible night last night. I had a good day today. The violin bridge DIDN"T snap down today LOL YAY lol... but I didn't have time to play it *frowns* lol... I will finish tuning it tomorrow morning and break it out tomorrow. I LOVE my violin :D and cello lol...
I'm taking a break on my peacock. ... lemme specify.... I'm taking a break from the IMMENSE quilling project I undertook lol... which is supposed to look like a peacock. It's half way completed :) I just needed a break before I do the last half, which will be VERY tedious and since it's so large, it'll be really intensive.
I'm hoping next year I can get the Lutherie books and tools, etc, like Will agreed :) I don't want to lose my interest in it with this HUGE wait... but at least this bill is getting paid off and then there's just the one last one, and it'll be all gone :D I'm excited.
I did a LOT of work for the local theater. I felt discouraged when some didn't seem to like that I did all the work and one outright interrupted me and they seemed to be getting bored while I was reading my list. I honestly didn't think it was THAT long >.< The president (a really awesome lady) said that she thought I shamed them because it was work they were all supposed to have done as well and did not. And there I was sitting there - NOT part of the board, but I did it anyway and did a great job and wrote up a report on what I found. In turn it spurred talk about how to better the theater, which was what she was hoping for! That made me feel good that it was beneficial. I also got blind-sided twice at the meeting and then spoken down to for the second time by one of the ladies.
I was confused as to why I was being treated like that and I won't lie... I was hurt, too! The president told me that it wasn't me and we chatted for a while. I feel a LOT better after our chat. :)
I baked for a bake sale at the farmer's market, which I'd been meaning to go to for eons. It's on a Wednesday, which I HATE! I prefer Will to drive me to new places when I don't know the area. Especially, since I have cataracts and I worry about driving into an area I don't know that may include a lot of glare and I especially don't like driving at night unless it's an area I know well and not far. My polarized glasses are still working great, but I worry about a day when they no longer cut it and I have to turn in my license.
I contacted a professor at Central Michigan University. I got her info from a worker of hers who visited my area on vacation. This deaf woman (epic woman by the way...) told me that her boss helps people and can help me get info to get Mitzie trained and certified as a guide dog (a seeing eye dog). This will help me in situations when I have to take the dogs out at night to do their business and also when I'm leaving the theater late at night.
Last night, when I stepped out of the theater to go home, the door shut behind me and BAM... I couldn't see a damn thing! At all... nothing... I stood there not sure where to move. I knew Will had the car somewhat near - I could hear the car engine. But I didn't know where he was and how far... I started to walk to where I thought he might be and used a foot to make sure I wasn't going down a ditch lol (not even ground... the theater parking is all dirt and uneven). All I could think was, "CRAP! I need Mitzie!" Luckily, Will finally realized that I couldn't see where the car was and came out to try to guide me. But, ya... I could REALLY use Mitzie all trained up now... especially with me being at the theater late a lot more often!!
With car head lights on I can see the road, etc... But if an on coming car has their brights on... HOLY CRAP!!!! I will look down and to the right... and follow the white line. I'm sure I'd feel more confident if I drove more often. My polarized lenses help me to see like a normal seeing person does. I just hardly drive these days and I worry ... cuz... I'm a worrier lol
mmm Violin...
I've been using Binaural and subliminal messages to help me deal with my PTSD. It's been working GREAT! I feel like I'm more myself ... not all the time, but for a good chunk of the day... then I'll listen to it again and I feel better again. The TRICK is getting Aria to let me have the hour to listen to it uninterrupted, so it can work. If she does that, then it lasts almost the whole day.
I liked how effective it was and decided to try one to increase my metabolism. The drugs I was on to help with the PTSD "helped" me to gain 80 pounds in two years... >.< Well, it shot my metabolism to hell. So, I'm hoping this helps fix it. I also try to go for walks, a bike ride, or use some of my exercise stuff to do SOMETHING - for any amount of time each day. I've lost 15 pounds... just another 65 to go!!!
We went to the Lumberman's Monument. GORGEOUS area! I love it here SO MUCH!... but all I have to say about that "monument" is ... damn... nearly 300 stairs!!! I huffed... and I puffed... and I almost blew my heart out lol... It was sad that I am that out of shape... I used to be able to do stuff like that with hardly any problem, pause, etc...
So, I told Will we need to go back there often :) So, I can beat those stairs! MUAHAHAHAHAHAH I shall persevere!! lol Conquer the stairs... n stuff... ok nap time? lol
I'll try to post again soon :)
Be well!!!
I actually wonder if I appear ADDish lol... somedays it's crafts crafts crafts... other days it's cello cello cello... other days it's YAY the violin bridge isn't snapping down! LOL!!!!
I had a horrible night last night. I had a good day today. The violin bridge DIDN"T snap down today LOL YAY lol... but I didn't have time to play it *frowns* lol... I will finish tuning it tomorrow morning and break it out tomorrow. I LOVE my violin :D and cello lol...
I'm taking a break on my peacock. ... lemme specify.... I'm taking a break from the IMMENSE quilling project I undertook lol... which is supposed to look like a peacock. It's half way completed :) I just needed a break before I do the last half, which will be VERY tedious and since it's so large, it'll be really intensive.
I'm hoping next year I can get the Lutherie books and tools, etc, like Will agreed :) I don't want to lose my interest in it with this HUGE wait... but at least this bill is getting paid off and then there's just the one last one, and it'll be all gone :D I'm excited.
I did a LOT of work for the local theater. I felt discouraged when some didn't seem to like that I did all the work and one outright interrupted me and they seemed to be getting bored while I was reading my list. I honestly didn't think it was THAT long >.< The president (a really awesome lady) said that she thought I shamed them because it was work they were all supposed to have done as well and did not. And there I was sitting there - NOT part of the board, but I did it anyway and did a great job and wrote up a report on what I found. In turn it spurred talk about how to better the theater, which was what she was hoping for! That made me feel good that it was beneficial. I also got blind-sided twice at the meeting and then spoken down to for the second time by one of the ladies.
I was confused as to why I was being treated like that and I won't lie... I was hurt, too! The president told me that it wasn't me and we chatted for a while. I feel a LOT better after our chat. :)
I baked for a bake sale at the farmer's market, which I'd been meaning to go to for eons. It's on a Wednesday, which I HATE! I prefer Will to drive me to new places when I don't know the area. Especially, since I have cataracts and I worry about driving into an area I don't know that may include a lot of glare and I especially don't like driving at night unless it's an area I know well and not far. My polarized glasses are still working great, but I worry about a day when they no longer cut it and I have to turn in my license.
I contacted a professor at Central Michigan University. I got her info from a worker of hers who visited my area on vacation. This deaf woman (epic woman by the way...) told me that her boss helps people and can help me get info to get Mitzie trained and certified as a guide dog (a seeing eye dog). This will help me in situations when I have to take the dogs out at night to do their business and also when I'm leaving the theater late at night.
Last night, when I stepped out of the theater to go home, the door shut behind me and BAM... I couldn't see a damn thing! At all... nothing... I stood there not sure where to move. I knew Will had the car somewhat near - I could hear the car engine. But I didn't know where he was and how far... I started to walk to where I thought he might be and used a foot to make sure I wasn't going down a ditch lol (not even ground... the theater parking is all dirt and uneven). All I could think was, "CRAP! I need Mitzie!" Luckily, Will finally realized that I couldn't see where the car was and came out to try to guide me. But, ya... I could REALLY use Mitzie all trained up now... especially with me being at the theater late a lot more often!!
With car head lights on I can see the road, etc... But if an on coming car has their brights on... HOLY CRAP!!!! I will look down and to the right... and follow the white line. I'm sure I'd feel more confident if I drove more often. My polarized lenses help me to see like a normal seeing person does. I just hardly drive these days and I worry ... cuz... I'm a worrier lol
mmm Violin...
I've been using Binaural and subliminal messages to help me deal with my PTSD. It's been working GREAT! I feel like I'm more myself ... not all the time, but for a good chunk of the day... then I'll listen to it again and I feel better again. The TRICK is getting Aria to let me have the hour to listen to it uninterrupted, so it can work. If she does that, then it lasts almost the whole day.
I liked how effective it was and decided to try one to increase my metabolism. The drugs I was on to help with the PTSD "helped" me to gain 80 pounds in two years... >.< Well, it shot my metabolism to hell. So, I'm hoping this helps fix it. I also try to go for walks, a bike ride, or use some of my exercise stuff to do SOMETHING - for any amount of time each day. I've lost 15 pounds... just another 65 to go!!!
We went to the Lumberman's Monument. GORGEOUS area! I love it here SO MUCH!... but all I have to say about that "monument" is ... damn... nearly 300 stairs!!! I huffed... and I puffed... and I almost blew my heart out lol... It was sad that I am that out of shape... I used to be able to do stuff like that with hardly any problem, pause, etc...
So, I told Will we need to go back there often :) So, I can beat those stairs! MUAHAHAHAHAHAH I shall persevere!! lol Conquer the stairs... n stuff... ok nap time? lol
I'll try to post again soon :)
Be well!!!
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